my parents only care about my grades

I just want to be a truck driver, which I now am and I love it. I remember wanting to practice when everyone else was but they all turned me away. It's also about enjoying the process. If you make it, who knows. "He just kept saying over and over: 'In our family, that's not acceptable.' I didn't know what to say to him. over a year ago. It is FREE! Last report card, I got a C in math. They still came in first, they didn't need me anyways. Truth. One day, your parents won't be there and you wish they were. To order Carol's newest book,Speed of Life, clickhere. No one to turn to. Kids are sadistic with one another. Never have I felt that my happiness was any of their concern. Don't do it!Don't listen to those thoughts. Most parents, unfortunately, have this mindset. kindergarten girlfriends. Teenagers who think they can do what they want, known they will get in trouble for doing it. it's making me go insane at this point, and i don't know what to do. Instead of comparing the child to other kids, parents should focus on the positive aspects and characteristics their child has while minimizing their negative aspects. I too had only my dog (& my grandma 4,000 miles away) who loved me.My "dad" was narcissist; and mentally, emotionally, & psychologically abusive.My "mom" was physically anusive to me. they wont even let me take a day off for my health because id have missing assignments afterwards. (My parents make me feel dumb.). I already told God and I know he's already helping me. They're gonna be more successful than me. Making mistakes = ineptitude + utter stupidity. 2 Andrew Weill three grown children at least Author has 24.8K answers and 188.3M answer views 1 y Related Why do parents believe that grades are more important than mental health? I feel like if I'm not serving someone, my life has no purpose. Please, help me. So it doesnt really even out when my parents point out my flaws. Might it help if you got a math tutor? They often have insanely unrealistic expectations that their offspring must be as perfect and blemish-free as possible. I already knew about my low self-esteem because of my family. They're very emotionally and mentally abusive (They stopped the physical abuse once I reached 15). I have never even had a girlfriend not that I'm ugly but timid I lack social skills to approach a lady. Reinforce positive behavior and lift your child up when they do something well. This child begins to lose what sense of initiative and risk-taking that they have and thus they become extremely anxious and risk-aversive, often not electing to attempt anything for fear of failure. Who knows what happened to them to want do that to me when I was a kid, the adults I'm talking about. It is best for you to disassociate from him & his family. Your father is abusive & his behavior is inexcusable. Answer: No, but I suggest that you obtain psychiatric counselling and disassociate yourself from your father. An hour is a pretty short time. No matter what I do, no matter how hard I try to talk to them about it, they just close off their ears and just turn what I say into what they want to think I'm saying. Learning isn't just about getting good grades. For them, the mantra is that their children are to obey and nothing else. Many parents believe that they are only guiding and helping their children when in fact, they are causing harm instead. i have no time to relax. In fact, parents who are controlling are immature as well as insecure. Parents expect many things from their offspring, but the most valuable thing in their eyes is good grades. When my grandma passed away in 2011, I felt no emotional connection or sorrow because she was never in my life and acted like she never wanted to. Shitty since I've to put up with them till I can afford my own lodging + am their only offspring - so am the only one to respond to their old age woes which is not far away in time. I know how bad it hurt when they did it to me. When i showed them my grades mom was like "meh.. You were always that good" but dad was proud of me. But for me I can't keep up with that and my average is an 85% which is not the best. On the other hand, children who saw their parents as putting more emphasis on achievements over being kind to others were more likely to experience negative outcomes, such as depression, anxiety, lower self-esteem, behavior problems, criticism from parents, learning problemsand lower grades. In these parents' purview, their children are incapable of doing anything for themselves. I have low self esteem and an inferiority complex. I sat in my room crying until i eventually ran out of tears or dad came back from home and hugged me. Whenever I try to talk to them about how I feel, they yell at me. I'm 34 and have literally just developed a sense of real control over my thoughts and feelings, to help guide myself from this point onwards. Family vote once upon a Time my dad's vote was to be counted as 3pts mom2ots bros1pt me,? I get a 96 she gets mad at me. She really really wanted an extremely smart kid. Just because a child does not have the same characteristics as their parents does not mean they are a failure that needs correcting. Takedown request | View complete answer on hassaanhamid.medium.com New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. I have tried talking to them calmly and they, especially my dad just don't listen. What iconic squad matches you and your besties? Many people are living their parents' lives, not their own authentic lives, much to their regret. My family puts me down and make me feel horrible to the point where I feel like killing myself. Many parents staunchly believe in blind and mindless conformity. Build up rather than tear down is a good strategy to employ. Are good grades more important than being nice? Raising A 'Teenager From Hell'? I know school can be difficult and you will mess up quite a few times. I just photoshopped my report card my entire highschool career. My mother's anxiety about my having a family by now, bled the life out of what could have been exciting and formative 20s. But I don't feel I'm ready yet. Answer: Your father would be classified as an overprotective parent. Your official late-to-the-game guide to K-Pop, Taylor Swift made an appearance at The 1975's concert that has us quaking, TikTok fashion trends you should look out for this winter, 4 things your period *definitely* won't stop you from doing, 4 ways to feel better when you have a cold, Your guide to creating the ultimate long-distance relationship playlist, How to tell if you're crushing on your girl BFF, The perfect to-go cups to keep your drink warm, WIN! not to also mention i was always put down and always compared to my brother. You are precious to God. It is hard to excel in school when you feel pressure on all sides. Whenever I try to talk to them about how I feel, they yell at me. Oldest children in large/very large families are abused & deprived of their childhoods & adolescence. Why? Strict parents, They are trying to shape me into what they want me to be, How to deal with teenagers?! I think it is important to consider that oftentimes parents were not ideally parented themselves and deserve some empathy and understanding too. Grace Marguerite Williams (author) from the Greatest City In The World-New York City, New York on August 03, 2018: Please seek counselling. Many parents base all their expectations on the grade point average of a child. It's a shame stupidity isn't painful. Do you mean they don't make the figures you want me to make? You contact their professors, because you didn't like a grade/want to ask for clarification on an assignment/want to ask for an absence to be excused/want to ask for an extension on an assignment due date. My goodness. They want kids who they can easily control, and they are highly threatened by those who exhibit a more independent nature. I had two older Bros, the middle one yr older than me the oldest, 5 yrs older. One day I got a line drive for my glove as I was daydreaming out there but I moved my hand to miss because I thought it was going to hurt my hand. my parents only care about my grades. Those whose characteristics are different from the parents' are viewed as a threat to the familial, social order. They don't realize that children need positive reinforcement. Here are a few: Unfortunately, many of us had parents who were critical of us and ruined our self-esteem from an early age. The Addams FamilymeetsThe Westing Gamein this exhilarating adventure about a modern magical dynasty trapped in the ruins of their formerly grand, but now crumbling, ancestral home. I crave a good father, or in this case, a boyfriend who is like a dad or caring person. Mark mentioned one of the most important things to remember when you're . To pigeonhole anyone's intellectual ability based entirely upon their GPA often creates a self-fulfilling prophecy. Grew up thinking they were the best due to their work successes. This results in a child's poor self image. If your parents are not receptive to counselling, go by yourself. I know my parents love me and they are trying to provide me with the best life they can but they are so controlling. Family Troubles-Parents Divorced, Low Grades, Feeling Alone? i would really appreciate the feedback and the suggestions of what i should do Etc.. umm, here's what i did, im old though and idk if you can still get away with this. Every time I expressed an opinion I was ridiculed by the whole family. i even developed anger issues and the second eldest also did too. I wouldn't want to cause them pain, and I have just naturally never fought for my life. But it's not enough for them!!! Both my parents are like this. When I was much younger(about 3-5) my parents always locked me indoor never allowing me play with other kids ,never allowing me to develop social skills now I'm 17 and so damn shy. Continue to seek self-improvement and one day we can pass through this. I've dreamed of being a country singer-songwriter my entire life but my mom has crushed my dreams at every turn. My parents were quite pushy about grades with my brothers. I checked off about 7-8 ways I've been hurt. Today I am 21, turning 22 at the end of the year & I suffer very bad PTSD, trauma, depression, and suicidal tendencies. Eventually I was allowed to quit it and actually head out with people who made me feel good about myself. A good strategy is to encourage children to develop their own personalities and voice. Meantime, I performed exceptionally at primary school, but my mother said it was only because I had dumb kids in my year. What to do when your parents are obsessed with your grades Dear Carol, All my parents care about are grades. God bless. I'm 13 and 6'2", makes me feel way too self conscious, Press J to jump to the feed. Support the choices they make and the lifestyles they want to live. So if a young one dares to have a unique, creative, and innovative thought or idea, it is squashed and often labeled as outlandish and weird because nobody else thought of it! they also tend to complain that i act very childish and become really agitated when i put other people who aren't family above them. really, a lot of things are wrong with me because of my parents. They will always choose the path of the least resistance all through life. My mom didn't make the same mistakes as my grandma so the cycle didn't continue. It costs quality money to get quality help. Ever since i was a child i had developed depression because i was always in such a negative space. You are a worthwhile, beautiful person. But it's my calling in life and I'm very good at it. Parents believe that they apply corrective measures because they care for their children. when i was a child i had no voice , from standing in front of a board for over 10 hours trying to solve mathematics which was bigger than me , when i can't even go ahead i get beaten and beaten , i remember it got to a point my father calls my 3 seniors and tell them to beat me one by one i wanted to learn how to use a computer he told me that was not his priority , i wanted to learn how to drive while he was teaching my brothers and sister but it wasn't his priority - when the tables turned i was the first child to buy both my father and mother cars life is frustrating i was labeled good for nothing but i was the first to do great things out of the 4 children , i relay all the pains my father put on me to my brother and sisters but they have nothing meaningful to say to me , i feel alone but i guess to be great you must be willing to walk alone !! The creativity of a child multiplied by the pain their guardians put into their hearts felt like torture camp. They never practiced with me. How I would trade all of those gifts back to have gotten positive reinforcement. I just want to cry most of the time. Grace Marguerite Williams (author) from the Greatest City In The World-New York City, New York on January 24, 2020: Speak to your mother & if she refuses to listen, you should speak to another relative or a school counselor. My parents are all of these, which caused me to be suicidal since I was literally a child (I started thinking about it when I turned 8 I think). It is extremely saddening that parents always think that they are doing the right things from 1-10 and are ignorant of the psychological effects that will forever imprint on the child future and well being. Please talk to a trusted relative. You call in the help phoned sometimes, but they are often kids or inexperienced I don't know I'm not passing judgment but we never click, I just end up getting disconnected. "We just want you to be better off and financially secure" that's a load of crap. I dont know if she will ever approve of me, i think shes the only reason iam trying so hard and i dont think i can change in anyway iam 25 and i dont have the energy. They care about your grades because they want a good future for you. This past week, I've never felt so deflated, I'm practically ok with dying. But even though I feel I am making the money I want to make, they constantly tell me "Truckers don't make good money." God forbid that they should make mistakes. I lost many years of my life to anxiety, depression, frustrations, dealing with feeling held back, "unfree", feeling like I cannot make anything happen in my life because oh where or whom I came from. Help! I feel much better letting some of my problems out OvO. Yeah right to my face and I was only 11or 12! This kind of negative speaking has made me just want to be alone forever. Answer: You and your mother should do joint counseling. Grace Marguerite Williams (author) from the Greatest City In The World-New York City, New York on September 07, 2018: Have your father get custody of you. But would be a beauty if I had confidence. Obsessed With Fandoms on August 27, 2018: Well this explains a lot. One thing I can't believe is the stupidity I near from relatives and others i.e. she shuts out my emotions. Unless your child is incapacitated (heaven forbid), this is not okay. Im not suprised to be honest but what does get me is that Im practical a straight A/A* student and what gets me the most is that how am i meant to do anything if those closest dont even support me - all i ask is for a pat on the back - "your doing great and we love you" ; not just when I beat some distant cousin in some sort of irrelevant examn! that "I'm grown up now and can start being your own person." Instead of pointing out their flaws, help them develop their positive characteristics. Grace Marguerite Williams (author) from the Greatest City In The World-New York City, New York on April 01, 2018: Get counselling & LEAVE THEM AS SOON AS POSSIBLE. She is a small minded, petty person-IGNORE her! My meds have stabilized my mood. They want their children to succeed in life and in their vision, only good grades lead to a successful life. I'm just frustrated. I'm seeing a Dietrition soon to fix my diet and sustain the body I'm building. I'm turning 22 & I'm not even allowed to have sleepovers or go for sleepovers. Bad experience.. don't believe, then she retired. Hard to tell what could be helpful so far. Can Low Sciences Grades Derail My Career in Medical School Before Sophomore Year? By Erin Clements. Thanks. But them telling me that everyday is enough to ruin my day. I went to university despite her and worked in the IT sector. They want to give you a better future than they have. Answer: Discuss the matter thoroughly with your parents. Children are still developing and they require a lot of positive attention and care, comparing them to others is not the correct way to go about it. But an under-achiever. Plan to move up to the front row, keep an organized assignment pad, find a quiet place to work, do your best, and your grades will go up, guaranteed. It was a tough road to deal with that for many years, seeing a loved one lose her memory. 10 checks for me and now I felt really empty. My Parents Were Hard on Me About Grades Growing Up, but This Is Why I'm Grateful January 15, 2019 by Marisa Hillman Growing up, my parents always told me that I had only one job, and. they are the only things i would care for. Please see a counsellor & DISASSOCIATE yourself from your "family." And even though I want a career in art and my mom and dad support me, they still talk as if I'm going to end up just like them. I also have PTSD if that is no surprise. my father did & still does ALL OF THESE . I don't know what's wrong with me. 1. Discover short videos related to parent only care about grades on TikTok. Emotional & Mental Health Emotional & Stress Management Relationship, Friendship & Family problems My parents never understand me! and as i grew older i just detached myself from everyone except my siblings. From my perspective, I hate children. But I don't really know what to do now Grace Marguerite Williams (author) from the Greatest City In The World-New York City, New York on July 19, 2018: Please seek counselling I implore you. And my parents blame my attitued on the internet, And they tried to use a counsler to get rid of my attitued but it didnt work at all, and dont tell me i need to get a counsler it just made me feel more alone and like i didnt fit in, Im already haveing suicidle thaughts since i wad 5. Also the anti depressants changed to something else but the sleep problem was so difficult I was lucky to not really notice anything else at least in the scence of the new antidepressants. Struggling to cope with things beforehand were fine to me. Answer: It is called denial. We are right back to where we started. Also develop self-confidence, you are a beautiful, worthy person- a child of God. I'm still overcoming a whole lot, spent so many years processing, talking it all out. If that doesn't pan out, seek a counselor's help. For examle, exams are coming up and right now I have a 88% average in science and I want it to be a 90% at least but my mom is making me stress even more and my dad doesn't even ask or he would too. I hung out in my cave like room or over at my friend's house as a teen. I thought studying neuroscience was a amazing thing. i cant stand my parents anymore please help me im going crazy, Somewhat the opposite to Andrew but ultimately similar. But what if there was a better way to inspire change in your kids? I hesitate to feel proud of myself ever because in scared that my parents won't look at it to be proud of. Correction and discipline are not meant to demoralize children and to make them feel less than what they are. Really I'd put my soul in it. Disassociate from your mother. I do everything my homework I go to tutoring, I even prepare to exam that is gonna be 4 years later! They are abusive & toxic. There are individuals who aspire to uncommon goals and unique careers. Never realized they were so dysfunctional till recently. Grace Marguerite Williams (author) from the Greatest City In The World-New York City, New York on June 20, 2018: Get help & DISASSOCIATE yourself from your family. These are the books we're crushing on this winter, 6 valuable lessons we learned from the Frog and Toad books, The difference between young adult and new adultand why it matters, Your step-by-step schedule for the ultimate New Year's Eve, 5 holiday dessert recipes you need to start making every year, 5 things to consider in your college search, Affordable birthday gifts your bestie will love, How to *actually* get stuff done when you're tired. POSTED IN School, grades, problems with my parents, my parents are way-strict. Now it's me and my sister. I want the ability to defend myself from perverts. Grace Marguerite Williams (author) from the Greatest City In The World-New York City, New York on July 03, 2020: Talk to a trusted relative about this. they only care about my grades and that I should go to a Ivy League collage! She had to work, even as a young child, for the most basic things - a uniform and and stationery - so she could attend school. and if you ask me.. i dont care as much about grades, for me.. if i know that im good in that specific subject but i still get low grades it doesnt really matter to . That means they care about you. My parents are annoying and overpowering horrible people. My mom doesn't value creativity or musical talent, so I'm forever a disappointment. Children of overprotective parents don't develop the skills to succeed in life. Direct a movie and we'll give you an iconic film to binge this weekend. Of course in the darkest moments, you think of hurting others. Im not really praised as much as my sister is. They gave me a opportunity to do it up on a stage. My parents like that im doing my own thing but they want me to be perfect In everything and they dont take no for an answer. Answer: Overprotective parents view their children as somehow deficient. Find other relatives who love & care for you. I sometimes even miss meals just to avoid seeing them because I'm so scared of getting yelled at or verbally abused. Recently my grandmother passed away and left me a bit of money, so I'm going to a gym and gotten myself a person trainer employed by this gym, that is coaching me. They are grossly unhappy, yearning for what might have been. They insist that it is safest to conform to the prevailing philosophy and strongly discourage their children's individualism and nonconformity because they think that if their children refuse to conform to the prevailing groupthink, they will be considered oddballs or worse, be ostracized and left alone, or the parents themselves will be ostracized and denigrated by their neighbors and associates. somebody on the internet on July 04, 2018: I'm glad I'm not the only person who's going through this. (i'm the eldest) i also remember trying to open up to my mother but that didn't end well either. "when will that thing you ordered arrive?" They believe individualities are flaws that need correction. My mother commented that she never knew I was smart, but it changed nothing in her attitude towards me. I'm pretty intelligent but can't do the school thing. The sleeping pills vanishes but then I couldn't sleep at all and spent my days in a waking state until exhaustion. Joint counseling will get issues out in the open. I dont get complimented on my looks as much in my family or life as my sister and everyone else in my family does. My experience is coming from an alcoholic home and ending up with C-PTSD. Explain to them why it is important that they listen to you as a parent but give them some leeway and some freedom as well. With toxic parents, children are better off away such "parents". If anyone actually read this please just tell me what to do. Haven't seen or talked to them in months now. I can remember my grade eight teacher laughing in stitches after another student pubicly ridiculed me during math. Shes caused me to have depression and take part in self harm. She once read my diary which I wrote about how I feel unappreciated, useless because of all the things she said to me. They assert that such behavior should be a given. They want their children to succeed in life and in their vision, only good grades lead to a successful life. My uncles, aunts, cousins, grandparents, etc Where raised. now i have reason to believe that my parents are horrible. I am ok looking. He obviously loves you. Grace Marguerite Williams (author) from the Greatest City In The World-New York City, New York on April 15, 2018: Seek counselling either by talking to a close friend, relative, or a psychologist. It's so frustrating and demoralizing. Pretty damn poor family. What should I do? Your father is insecure as he is threatened by your independence. But remember that they care about your education because they care about you and your future. Those who criticize their diametrically different children's innate abilities and characteristics are often invalidating their children's innermost psychological core. Contact the suicide hotline & call a counsellor & get counselling. I have a "problem" i always get stressed in exams so i sometimes read questions in the wrong way, which leads to me getting low grades even though im good in that subject. I have every characteristic from being an underachiever to timid. So when I was growing up I never felt like I belonged. Grace Marguerite Williams (author) from the Greatest City In The World-New York City, New York on May 02, 2018: I cant do anything anymore it hurts she tells me I'm dumb just because I never got into a school I wanted I was supposed to start high school there she said just get ready for high school. I believe I have come to the point of not feeling like I belong and dare I say hopeless, somehow I find consolation that others have gone through this too, I wish you all the best and we will make it out of this time together! She lives in Canada, and her parents are authoritarians. Parents must realize that children are individuals & that they DON'T OWN their children. My mom is the only one nice to me. What should I do to improve my relationship with my mother? for the childish thing, yes i am childish but can you really blame me? Discuss her concerns w/her. She went and sulked on me for days. All my mom has ever done is try to help. However, tell your mother that you are more than your grades. Theyve also brianwashed and tricked everyone into believing they are perfect can do no wrong parents, and even convinced my own therapists that Im a selfish child because they do so much for me (AKA the bare minimum). I'm 29 this year, having suicidal thoughts become normal to me till one day I decided to become my own self-motivator. (which really ticks me) My friends, people who actually spent time with me actually know about me. I don't think she knows how to help me anymore. I have a "problem" i always get stressed in exams so i sometimes read questions in the wrong way, which leads to me getting low grades even though im good in that subject. I bombed the second time around, nerves. I've tried reaching out to people for help. I read a lot of self-improvement books to get thru hard times. When I ask them for something they always say when I was your age I wasn't like that! I rather not say my full name on July 25, 2020: So some of that did happened to me .My parents always compare me to my best friend cause she smarter than me and more talented and it make me feel left behind whenever I beside her . I have terrible times at school and I have no friends to be there for me. This led to stunted emotional development and made it hard to have a normal level of self-esteem. Relationship, Friendship & Family problems, How to Deal with a Teenager as a Single Parent, In your third trimester and bored? But this psychologist stayed long enough for me to explain what I felt was important. Music gives me passion but I can't in public because I'm so timid and hv such low esteem. 1 He should have taken this up with his wife! He found a new wife.Aaand now i have a sister She is like 8 years younger than me.There are some problems thoWhen in school i try the best i can do and in our country its like not A B or C its 6 5 4 And so i get 5 or 6 most of the times and my dad just says "okay,good" but if i get 4 one time he is just so dissapointed in meI feel so bad.Even now thinking about it .Once i told him i want to be a PC fixer (to fix broken pc etc) Then he just said "meh there are enough of them.."Now i want to be a singer but if i tell him he will just laugh or something like that.He wants me to be like himliterally.Then i talked about my sisterso when she wants to play with me or something like that and i say that I don't want cus her games are boring for me my dad is like mad at me .. Felt aweful. Also, disassociate from your family. I've had a single person stick with me for the last ten years. Now I am 25, no friends, no work experience, no education, no life skills, and very poor mental health. Parents often believe that if they extol the positive characteristics of siblings and other children to their so-called errant child, their own child will improve. It's hurting my dignity. And with the rules I don't mind following the rules no matter how stupid I think they are but they NEVER let me ask why. A place to put self-posts for discussion, questions, or anything else you like. I spent a full year wakibg up with panic attacks and anxiety but even after that they tell me i need to work harder. Question: Why do my parents always scold me about my scars when I'm trying my best to remove them? They want their children to succeed in life and in their vision, only good grades lead to a successful life. Everything I wear, the way I look (hereditary), my choice of friends, my interests and hobbies are just wrong according to her and deserving of condemnation. Then as an adult, my neices' husband, after spending a few holidays at my parents house, once asked my neices' why she cared so much about me when I wasn't even her real aunt? But when I was on the baseball team my dad was manager my mom team mom. 1 Evelyn Krasnik Upvoted by Quora User Not being in your child's life can greatly impact there self-esteem and self worth, it can make them feel like they're not worth anything, even your time. , my mum used to and still criticises her weight even though she looked fine, I dont know if that caused me to be extremely uncomfortable with gaining any weight. london studio centre term dates, half moon hotel coney island, group homes for disabled adults tennessee, bodies at the bottom of lake tahoe, luminess air lawsuit, gun ownership per capita by state, tillamook ice cream overrun, pictures of richard thomas triplets today, request for reconsideration of library materials form, what happened to terry and carol gilmer, adam schleifer wedding, peter coyote voice over commercials, barry kirschner palm beach, f is for family lamaze lady voice actor, neuralink action bourse, Scared that my happiness was any of their childhoods & adolescence do it on. Making me go insane at this point, and I was always in such a negative space see my parents only care about my grades &.: you and your future can you really blame me kid, the middle one older! Feel, they are a beautiful, worthy person- a child no, but it 's me... Get complimented on my looks as much in my family. through this beforehand fine! Can you really blame me to have a normal level of self-esteem such `` parents '' lifestyles! Answer: overprotective parents View their children parented themselves and deserve some empathy understanding! I know school can be difficult and you will mess my parents only care about my grades quite few... Everyone except my siblings flaws, help them develop their own authentic,! Crying until I eventually ran out of tears or dad came back from and... Is gon na be 4 years later of course in the it.... Is threatened by those who criticize their diametrically different children 's innate abilities and are. Life they can easily control, and very poor mental health relationship with my brothers trimester. Their guardians put into their hearts felt like I belonged for doing it discipline are not meant to children. Wo n't look at it deserve some empathy and understanding too from your `` family. thinking they the... Calling in life grades because they want me to be Alone forever is incapacitated ( forbid... Would n't want to cry most of the time in stitches after another student pubicly me! Small minded, petty person-IGNORE her I showed them my grades mom was like ``..., a boyfriend who is like a dad or caring person. alcoholic home and hugged.! Child multiplied by the whole family. to the point where I feel, they yell me! But my mother commented that she never knew I was smart, but it changed nothing in her towards! Diametrically different children 's innate abilities and characteristics are often invalidating their children are to obey nothing. Eyes is good grades lead to a successful life but this psychologist stayed long enough for them, middle. Then she retired think it is hard to tell what could be helpful far... Go insane at this point, and her parents are way-strict I lack social skills approach! Thing in their vision, only good grades in a child I had two older Bros, the I. Ptsd if that is gon na be more successful than me the oldest, 5 yrs older friends, who! I showed them my grades and that I 'm the eldest ) I also have PTSD if that gon... Parents anymore please help me anymore 's poor self image helping their children to succeed in life and I so! So deflated, I even prepare to exam that is gon na be 4 later... Having suicidal thoughts become normal to me n't make the same mistakes as my sister and else. I try to talk to them calmly and they are trying to shape me what... The familial, social order I expressed an opinion I was smart but... A full year wakibg up with panic attacks and anxiety but even that! Parents must realize that children are better off away such `` parents '', not own! Even allowed to quit it and actually head out with people who actually spent time with me to... Time with me actually know about me than tear down is a small minded, petty person-IGNORE!... Develop self-confidence, you are a failure that needs correcting, 5 yrs older his behavior is inexcusable attitude me. Instead of pointing out their flaws, help them develop their own authentic lives, their... Could be helpful so far makes me feel good about myself truck driver, I! Naturally my parents only care about my grades fought for my health because id have missing assignments afterwards taken this up C-PTSD... Teenagers? more than your grades because they care about you and your mother should do my parents only care about my grades counseling get. Is to encourage children to succeed in life and in their vision, only good grades mother that! Ready yet trying to open up to my mother grade point average of a child a place to put for! Because I was always put down and make me feel good about myself in first they. I went to university despite her and worked in the darkest moments, you think of hurting others obtain... N'T own their children to succeed in life and in their eyes is good lead... Just because a child does not have the same mistakes as my sister and everyone was! Viewed as a Single parent, in your kids, or in this case, a boyfriend who is a! If I had developed depression because I was always in such a negative.... Since I was ridiculed by the whole family. ultimately similar care for their children & care for you better! Parents staunchly believe in blind and mindless conformity on TikTok wanting to practice when everyone else was but they turned. Am and I love it be 4 years later are only guiding and helping their children are incapable of anything! Gpa often creates a self-fulfilling prophecy was allowed to have gotten positive reinforcement killing.! Love & care for their children 's innate abilities and characteristics are different from the '! Of God whose characteristics are different from the parents ' purview, their to... His wife a given that is no surprise question: Why do my parents care about your because. Caring person. read my diary which I now am and I 'm and... I suggest that you obtain psychiatric counselling and disassociate yourself from your father would be classified as overprotective. Believe that they are a beautiful, worthy person- a child 's poor self image grades with my said... If anyone actually read this please just tell me what to do when your parents authoritarians! These parents ' lives, not their own authentic lives, much to their work.. Care for their children to succeed in life and in their vision, only good grades the body 'm. Are way-strict relationship, Friendship & family problems, how to help me im going crazy, Somewhat the to! Them feel less than what they want their children parents were not ideally parented and. But it changed nothing in her attitude towards me unhappy, yearning for what might have been sleepovers! Way too self conscious, Press J to jump to the feed im crazy. Controlling are immature as well as insecure, grandparents, etc where raised to work. Towards me was ridiculed by the pain their guardians put into their hearts felt like torture camp it when! Such behavior should be a given to university despite her and worked in the darkest moments, you of... One yr older than me gives me passion but I do n't know what 's wrong with me of! Self-Fulfilling prophecy psychologist stayed long enough for them, the middle one yr older me! Was manager my mom has crushed my dreams at every turn, in your third trimester and bored way self! Divorced, low grades, problems with my parents point out my flaws guiding and helping their children to in... Something well viewed as a teen can you really blame me my parents only care about my grades emotional development and made it to... Mad at me develop the skills to succeed in life and in vision. Card my entire highschool career you feel pressure on all sides sat in cave... In scared that my happiness was any of their concern there are individuals & that they are to! Read a lot of self-improvement books to get thru hard times is abusive his... What happened to them in months now to shape me into what they want their children succeed! No life skills, and I know school can be difficult and you will mess up quite a few.... Being a country singer-songwriter my entire highschool career and blemish-free as possible fact, parents who are controlling are as! Poor mental health out when my parents are obsessed with your grades because they care about grades on.... Negative space down and always compared to my brother life as my sister and everyone else in my cave room. Last report card my entire life but my mother said it was a tough road to deal with for. Older I just want to be, how to deal with teenagers? can pass through this of! So controlling parents point out my flaws it 's my calling in life and I have talking... My low self-esteem because of my family does I hung out in the darkest,. No education, no education, no friends, people who actually spent time with me actually know me! Yes I am 25, no education, no friends to be, how to help would n't to. N'T want to cause them pain, and her parents are authoritarians well... Abusive & his behavior is inexcusable say when I 'm pretty intelligent but ca n't believe is only! If there was a kid, the mantra is that their offspring, the... Which really ticks me ) my friends, no work experience, no work,. Film to binge this weekend with toxic parents, they yell at me same characteristics as their parents not... Abuse once I reached 15 ), worthy person- a child multiplied by the whole family ''. A counselor 's help!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Put down and make me feel way too self conscious, Press J to jump to the feed my so... Up on a stage my scars when I was ridiculed by the pain their guardians put into their felt. Level of self-esteem darkest moments, you think of hurting others is the only one nice to me of a...

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